Credit
Midnight Fling
❝ People run from rain but
sit
in bathtubs full of
water. ❞
-

Charles Bukowski (via bittersweetsongs)

Wow bukowski so profound do you also bathe fully clothed you dickhead. “Oohh isn’t it funny that a person will eat when they’re hungry but will duck if you throw an apple at their face”

(via coolestpriest)

(Source: cachaemic)

protego-et-servio:

jesussaves333:

Most of them I can’t contain within one post. Not if I explained on and on for hundreds of paragraphs. I just don’t see how two human cells (a sperm and egg cell) can produce anything inhuman.

It makes a human, but it doesn’t make a person. To be a…

❝ There are days that I cannot find the sun even though its right outside my goddamn window. ❞
- Neil Hilborn, “This is Not the End of the World” (via de-payse)

(Source: beba-s)

toastdurr:

fairyspork:

floptart:

ass2007:

im so glad my boyfriends penis is 2 bread lengths long (:

image

Who the fuck measures dick size in bread

realniggaannouncements:

I had a dream last night that Jesus finally resurrected and when white people found out he wasn’t white they arrested him for 2000 something years of tax evasion  

thanestittywindow:

cndycrn:

A programmer is going out for a stroll one evening. His wife asks him to swing by the store and pick up a gallon of milk, and if they had eggs, to get a dozen. He returned with twelve gallons of milk and said “They had eggs.”

if (eggs==true){
  bring.milk(12)
}

(Source: cssdy)

lolfactory:

It’ll Never Happen Again- funny pics tumblr